I’ve been
struggling to write this post simply because it’s such a broad topic and I
don’t want to come across as one sided.
I’m not
speaking on behalf of every woman, I’m just stating an idea of the general
consensus from the close group of women in my circle regarding love.
A friend of
mine has been in a relationship with someone for 10 years and isn’t the least
bit interested in getting married.
She is a
strong woman, in her religion, work, socially and has her feet placed firmly on
the ground.
Loves her
boyfriend but their values, religious beliefs, family culture and ambition are
worlds apart.
Their love
is unique and special to her and has carried them through a lot but is always a
question of whether it’s enough.
So an
arrogant, pompous troll (for lack of a better description) comes along, a
complete stencil of a good investment promising optimal returns BUT…no love, no
attraction, rather annoying mostly but she just can’t seem to get him out of
her head. (Sing like Kylie Minogue) They share the same beliefs, and come from
similar backgrounds.
All of a
sudden she is thinking ahead… can she deal with all the issues in her current
relationship, is she strong enough for the challenge IF she decides to marry her
boyfriend?
Before
anyone thinks this is about love and the vegetarian vampire that sparkles in
the sun, please hold your horses.
Typically
the opposite of what you’ll find in a romantic story outline….2 birds from 2
different nests, she is a humming bird and he is just a pigeon sitting on
telephone cable singing on the wings of love….
Together
flying high-eye….NO…the South Easter will be coming and you better be of 747 caliber
if you want to survive it!
I would just
like to say….
You STILL
have a choice in finding someone who is going to check majority, if not all, of the tick boxes
on the list you want.
You want a
man who is career driven, so he can take care of you…..even though you are
independent, empowered, professional and strong and VERY capable of taking care
of yourself.
You want
someone who shares similar religious or cultural values….it might not matter
now, but it will very well make things a hell of a lot easier if you plan on
having kids.
You want
someone who will respect your family and someone who is constantly open to
changing and improving.
You want a
partner who will support you and who will take a superior role in your times of
need.
It’s not
about falling deeply in love and expecting that to carry you through until the
end of time.
I’m sorry,
any experienced woman in a successful marriage will tell you….Love grows and is
a mere component of a good partnership.
There is
nothing wrong in looking for someone who is able to sustain you, even though you can very well take care of
yourself.
Someone who
can lead, even though most of his decisions will be driven and managed by you
from behind the scenes.
You see what
I’m saying here people….
Behind
every successful man is a great woman.
Men were
created to hunt, they love taking care of women, they pride themselves on
providing for their families.
Women are
pushing boundaries, fighting strongly and fiercely against the proverbial
traditional mould…which may differ but is essentially similar.
Caregiver,
nurturer, supporter, helper, stop whatever you’re doing and attend to me-er.””
We can be
career woman, mothers, wives and friends.
All I’m
saying is you can have the best of both worlds without turning into an alpha
female, which doesn’t even sound right.
Before I
upset anyone, I’m not saying it doesn’t work but what I’m saying is I don’t think
any young lady dreams of one day finding a man and providing fully for him
while he happily loves her with no desire to become a hunter!
It’s just
not how we’re wired.
I think the
point I’m trying to make is this…
LOVE will
not and simply cannot, conquer all.
Most things….but
not all folks…not all!!!!!!!!!
