Innovation of the kitchen appliance disciplinarian!

When you are 39 weeks pregnant and you don't have the energy to speak sternly to your developing toddler without losing your breath after a few seconds, you have to innovate. My 16 month old, miss independence, has become rather challenging at times to control and after loads of reading, asking, talking and pondering on discipline I have finally resorted to a kitchen appliance who has done the trick.

Thank you Russell Hobbs stick blender for keeping my daughters fingers out of plug points, away from windows she could potentially fall out, out of the oven and stove no zone area and  most importantly away from glass objects that could potentially cut her. At first she was terrified in a way that made me feel cruel and harsh, now all I have to do is make the "ZZZzzzzz" sound and she happily obeys, redirects her attention and plays along happily. She now brushes her teeth with no fuss, allows me to dress her with no fuss, hell at this rate I'm thinking of even putting in some new earrings while she is awake (she's pulled all kinds out as her pincer skills are quite advanced for her age)

My mother used a wooden spoon, her mother used a pin, my little one will probably end up using some techno advanced appliance with her kids, it works!

My husband thinks I'm cruel, I'd much rather describe myself as a successful disciplinarian.

 
Onto the next one (sigh happily)

Cheeses Christ, stop complaining and keep on keeping on!

Today  is the 7^th June and it’s raining horses and tigers in Cape Town.

So beautiful!!!!!!!!

The only thing that could spoil this day for me is the “woe is me” mentality of some people.

Arrrgghhh, oh no I am travelling via public transport in the rain, oh shame this and oh shame that.

You know what, if you are ill or physically challenged then I sympathize with you but if you are perfectly healthy and have no excuse whatsoever then I have a few words for you.

Get over it and get on with it.

Stop feeling sorry for yourself.

I understand the morale of people has decreased over the past few years since the economic recession hit and the “woe is me” attitude became incredibly common in SOME communities.

I am ONLY targeting those people who have a lot to be thankful for but walk around feeling sorry for themselves because they don’t have the comfort they would like to have in this weather.

There are less fortunate people who wake up every day and try and make a way.

You know what; an attitude change is in order.

We all have our stuff but we carry on every day and try harder.

Let me tell you a story…

Once upon a time, there was a pregnant fairy who took a duvet day from work as her body was feeling a bit run down at 8 months.

After 3 hours of morning rest, she got up to enjoy breakfast, listening to the sound of silence.

The guilt of sending her toddler to her granny and sending her husband off with no lunch quickly subsided as her body slowly entered relaxed mode.

It had been far too long since she’d spent alone time with herself.

Her eyes wondered across the lounge and over to the toys that lay scattered on the ground, she checked the time on the microwave … 11H45.

She smiled pensively to herself ready to just get lost in thought.

Blocking out the OCD voice that was telling her to take advantage of this time to do a deep home cleanse.

Read, maybe I shall read…she thought.

The title of a book called “who moved my cheese?” lay on the kitchen counter and immediately caught her attention.

This is a book that was recommended to her husband by a friend of his.

He finished this book in a half an hour as it was a quick easy read, printed in font 18.

“Who moved my cheese?” by Spencer Johnson is an amazingly simple life lesson told through an easy to read story about how to deal with change in your work and in your life.

READ IT and change your attitude, then change your life J

The end!!!!!!!!!!

THE LADY IS A CHAMP

I love my little girl so much and I am so fearful and anxious of the next few months because I have no idea of how its going to impact her.

I am due with a second one in July and the gap between the two is very small. I have been very aware of not neglecting her throughout this pregnancy because of the gap. (Talk to the Hand - Don't judge me)

The past 2 weeks has been very hectic on my back. Immense lower back pain to the point where I struggle to stand up straight. I have started an affair with a warm water bottle at work. To top things off the lift has been out of order for almost 3 weeks now.

 

The building only has 2 floors but its still hard when u feel like you are climbing a mountain carrying 2 pockets of potatoes. Especially when greeted with sympathetic eyes from woman who have been pregnant. Comments from women who have never been pregnant, as well as men who have no clue like 'its good exercise' makes you want to burst into tears for various reasons. Then to top it off my little lamb has been restless for 3 nights, crying out for 'mommy' in her sleep and I don't even have the strength to get up and fetch her. My husband will pick her up and place her behind my fat back while she spoons me. Imagine spooning with a smallie where she is the big spoon. You kind of sleep anxiously, fearful that you might squash a little person to a pulp. So yes, I am tired, worn out, heavy and just plain old uncomfortable but I will carry on.
The purpose of this post is to say to all woman trying their best everyday to figure things out...

"You is kind, you is smart, you is intelligent" (quoted from a book & movie called 'The Help')

Another thing is:

"We were made special with shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world,yet gentle enough to give comfort.

With inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times comes from children.

Hardness allowing us to keep going when everyone else gives up, and take care of our family through sickness and fatigue without complaining, (ok maybe a little complaining).

Sensitivity to love our children under any and all circumstances, even when they hurt us very badly.

Strength to carry our husbands through their faults, we were fashioned from his rib to protect his heart.

We were made with wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him.

Finally, we were given tears to use exclusively whenever it is needed.

  

The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair, but must be seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart - the place where love resides."

I took a duvet day to recooperate and waking up to the above message confirmed that I am blessed to be a woman!

What defines you!

What defines you?

Im interested to know.

Do most people spend their time contemplating this?

Do they go through phases trying to figure it out OR do some find comfort in a rigid zone and stay there their whole lives with no desire to leave it.

Some say:

“Your background and environment in the early years are the beginnings of what will finally define you .

This nurturing and exposure combined with your genetic makeup inherited over thousands of years is what builds your character, develops your integrity and gives you that aura and personality..
Character, integrity and aura and personality are all the things that define a person.”….Unknown

Others say:

“The mind”

"My job"

“Where I am at that particular point in my life”

I agree with most of these opinions yet I also say the following:

The people in my life define me.

In a world where you can be anything... be yourself.

Do you know that song?

Today is NOT the day for me!

Today I want to slap the colleague who feels the need to call me and update me on their overflowing workload.

Im thinking “You are stressing about the ever so much to do and so little time, when actually that was 15 minutes of unconstructive time WASTED on a bitch and a moan”

Today I want to knock the pedestrian J-walking at the pace of a snail when I am late for walk.

Today I want to bomb the cashier at the store asking if my bulging bump is as a result of pregnancy…either that or I have a oversized hernia you moron!

Needless to say yet of paramount importance to mention, the catalyst to the start of my crap day would have to be blamed on the man.

The man who can very well take your sweet warm comforting sunshine and turn it into a dark, cold, gloomy day filled with HARD drops of rain.

Men are strong, men are leaders but men are also DUMB and ANNOYING.

They DO NOT have our patience, they most certainly DO NOT possess our endurance NOR our perseverance!

For example : Have you ever heard of a man cold?

On a scale of 1 to 10 where 1 is least unlikely to die and 10 is most definitely likely to be shaking hands with death, men find it necessary to rate themselves a 9 when experiencing a runny nose and a sore throat.

It’s called a man cold!

Now sing to the tune of “Tragedy”

Man Cold…. When you lose control and act like an A-hole

Man Cold…  When you cough you cry, you can walk but you lie

It’s hard to bear, repelling your wife with your cries of despair (Music)

Man Cold…. When try so hard to act like a retard

Man Cold…  When you seek her time but she thinks you’re slime…

Get a life, before you end up all alone with no wife!

Enough said!

Some heart for the day!

We were talking about the partners our kids would choose when they grow up.

We were advising each other on being open and prepared for their choices,  trying to envision the advice we would give them one day when asked about choosing a spouse.

He then mentioned that one day he would tell them the greatest love story in his mind.

Right there and then, my love for him grew exponentially.

Falling in love with him was one of theeeee best and most fun JJJ experiences of my life J

This is for you, I want you to know how much I appreciate you.

I want you to know how you are the other half of me and without you I would be incomplete.

Cheesy words but there are no others fitting to describe it.

You get me even when you don’t.

Every day we change and yet we still fit together perfectly.

We’ve witnessed a lot of “gone too soon’s” recently and just thinking about those partners left behind makes me wanna say…

Treasure your partner, companion, friend, lover, spouse.

Don’t take them for granted especially if you feel they are your match.

There are many cases where people move on, and it’s understandable and realistic.

To my special one…

Anyone else would just be second best.

Quotes by Lady Poo...

When in doubt, eat some chocolate.

If there are problems in your marriage….he's a douche bag!

Should someone irritate you, fart in their face.

If your wife is being extraordinarily kind, buy Imodium because inevitably you WILL poop in your pants.

When your toddler throws a tantrum, mirror their actions, they will be shocked!

When someone trips and falls flat on their face or even walks into a glass door with a thump, PLEASE DO NOT LAUGH THERE AND THEN.

Digression from quotes:

Im actually being serious, I have a friend who will probably break out in hysterics just by reading the above sentence.

She justifies this with the following: the person who has been wronged by the forces of nature shouldn’t be so upset when it happens to them, they should giggle in embarrassment, rather than curse the laws of gravity in anger.

Thinking about her justification makes me giggle to myself but AGAIN as referred to above, DO NOT LAUGH THERE AND THEN.

Continuation of quotes:

In the event of your computer freezing, HIT IT! (It will make you feel better)

In conclusion, my MOST insightful quote would have to be....

NEVER EVER give up…..on finding the perfect shoe J